Can I just introduce myself to those of you who might be new here? Actually, this might be a new story for all of you...
My name is Anna. I'm 38 years old, and mother to four children, whom I homeschool. They are 13, 11, 7, and 5.
I'm married to Donnie, the most incredible man. We dated off and on in high school and college...it was a mess. Lots of break ups, broken hearts, and insecurity. We went our separate ways, and without the other knowing it was happening, we each fell in LOVE with Jesus. It happened to me in an amazing way.
I had decided to take some time off of dating. I was a chronic relationship junkie. I was good at the drama, and it was really the only value I saw in myself. So I thought maybe some time away from that would do me good. I was nearing the end of my commitment of time, and I noticed I felt exactly the SAME as I had before I started. I wasn't changed. I wasn't growing. All I was, was lonely.
I was in church one Sunday, and this man was telling a story about his father. He said he had met Jesus, and he was so amazed and changed by the love of Christ, that he wanted to tell his dad. But he was such a new Christian, he was worried that he didn't know enough about the Bible to be able to speak confidently to his father. So he read the Bible, and then he went to share Jesus with his dad. I honestly have no idea what happened after that in this man's story. All I heard was "I read the Bible" spoken as if it were no big thing.
I had grown up in church, given my heart to the Lord at a young age, and maintained a fairly close relationship to Him over the years. But the idea of reading the entire Bible, all fifteen-hundred-and-however-many pages of it? Like it was just some book? Without an accompanying Bible Study booklet or concordance or complicated read-in-a-year schedule? This had NEVER occurred to me. But I went home that very day and started reading. For the next few weeks, I was never seen without it. Ever. The only notes I took were a list of chapter "titles" that I came up with and wrote in an old spiral. After I finished a page, I drew a line down the center, between the two columns and moved on. Some time around Genesis, Donnie started showing interest in dating me again. He had decided to go to BIBLE COLLEGE of all things, which I was very cynical about. I gave him a piece of paper with "Genesis 29:20" written on it, and told him to wait "just a few days."
I finished reading the Bible in 2 1/2 months. Reading that quickly from cover to cover, I was able to see the big picture and how it all fit together. There was no "angry God of the old testament" vs. the "forgiving Jesus of the New Testament". It was clearly the same God throughout, laying out and demonstrating His plan of mercy, forgiveness, and restoration from the very beginning. I was HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE.
So...what to do about Donnie? The idea of reverting to old habits was not an option. I had renewed faith and hope for the future, and I was not about to compromise that for anything. This is where it gets really good. In fact, even though it was almost 18 YEARS ago, I'm crying tears of joy and thankfulness as I type this.
In the time that we were apart, Jesus had won over Donnie's heart and LIFE, too. I still cannot imagine why He would ordain something so beautiful. I had been worrying that Donnie would pull me back into our old habits of selfishness, sin, and pain, and INSTEAD? God had taken hold of his heart and grown him into someone I could look up to--who would build me up and spur me on, instead of dragging me down. (I'm weeping like Joan Wilder at the beginning of Romancing the Stone now.) In fact, although it's a story for another time, he would literally SAVE me from an addiction that could have taken my LIFE in the next year.
So when I say he's incredible, it's because it's true. Our love story is intertwined with THE love story. When I was in the midst of the mess, and the heartache, and the loneliness, I never could have imagined that Jesus was there with me. But He fought His way through all that and made Himself known to me. And I have never been the same.
I'm begging you, friends. If you do not yet know that powerful love of Jesus, to the point where He has changed your BEING, and rescued you from your own self, I'm begging you to call out to Him. You only need to know one prayer: Help. And you only need one Book to get to know Him. I suggest you start in Genesis.
Much love,
Anna
